...in the bottom drawer
I knew I'd lose it so I put it in a safe place, and now I can't remember where it is.

currently stashed in: Cheshire Street, London
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July 11, 2005 || 9:41 am
Post-disaster update

Well, I safely arrived over the Atlantic and back to the mother city. Given what Tom Coates quite aptly called 'the week that never ends' there's a fair bit to report.

Having been really in quite a lot of shock and distress over the bombings while I was in America, I was rather disconcerted and even more shocked when I spoke to my boy and family on the phone to check their continued presence on the planet and they all sounded incredibly blase. Having got back here, London has obviously had the same effect on me because any trace of fear, worry, anxiety etc has disappeared from my mind. I spoke to one friend yesterday to catch up and when I said something about the 'terrible events' she said 'what terrible events?' - and it is absolutely true that the whole city seems to be living as normal - drinking, eating, partying, moaning about small things.

I tried to think why this is - why the city stayed so calm in the immediate aftermath and even, why the evacuations of the tube trains were so panic-free as it seems. Some ideas - the much-repeated argument that we're used to this after the IRA. That we were all expecting something to happen and it wasn't as bad as it could have been so we're glad it's over with for now. My personal idea is that we are so used to daily security alerts, which are generally false alarms, and the tube breaking, bus diversions, transport hell generally because our system is so creaky, that when a train stops and everyone is told to get off we all sigh and just do it rather than panicking. Oh, we're late for work again, never mind.

Regarding life continuing as normal, well, what are we meant to do? I'm glad the British aren't the hysterical types. It's also quite strange that as almost all the damage is below ground, there is nothing to see on the surface that might disturb you. So it is very easy to just continue going around as usual with no visual reminder of the attacks.

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